Author Archives: Vintage Guap

The Chainsmokers – The One (Audio)

I don’t really understand why there is a bit of hate on for Chainsmokers’ approach to production and songwriting. So because someone figured out what works for them, what their fans like, what they want to hear, and they do it consistently, we should hate them for it? Mutherfuckers out there bitching about “oh I miss the old eminem why can’t he just do the thing he does so well that  we liked?”. I sense a bit of envy from what I think, are most likely, pimply faced producers who are writers for stupid little blogs who never popped the fuck off with their craft. And now they’re jumping on their keyboard being warriors trying to tear into someone they wish they were. Well fuck all that. I like these guys’ music, I enjoy their writing and I like them as humans. The dreamkillers can catch a fat one. I have heard all sorts of different genre executions from these guys over the years and as far as their musical chops go, I don’t think many people can really stand next to them without getting schooled. Do your homework you lil’ bloggers, dig back into a catalogue of an artist before you make stupid clickbait posts on your garbage social media. Now that my rant is over, a few words about this song. This one is a easy listening one that has a bit of a constant build up until the very end. I could see this being synced to movies and commercials for sure. Some slow mo shots and shit like that.

Follow: The Chainsmokers

Guap. Out.

Antra – Gone

The vocal chops on this are just so fuckin’ vibey yo. I remember hearing that old Flume shit that I wish was still happening in terms of acoustic treatment and structure. This shit has some grit and life to it. Feels slightly drunk and detuned and oddly enough soulful as hell. I want to just do a bunch of drugs in the hot sun to this and ride around on a bike much too small for me, in circles, slowly.

Follow: Antra

Guap. Out.

Infuze feat. Oktavian – Orbit

This here is a pretty little number “ORBIT” by one of my favorite producers and vocalists. Infuze and Oktavian. Both are really good at what they do. One is a audionerd supreme (judging by the engineering on this cut) and the other one is wordnerd supreme, due to the fact that his writing isn’t the hot garbage that I normally get hit with on a daily basis. Thank you fellas for making music that doesn’t make me want to throw my laptop into the ocean.

Follow: Infuze and Oktavian

Guap. Out.

Guappy’s Giant Travel Playlist part deux

Okay Kids. So I have been on the road and growing a beard lately. Shit is getting real out here. The other day I ate a can of baked beans, cold, in the parking lot of a gas station while little 8 year old Spanish kids laughed at me and called me homeless. I just wanted to see the world man! Homeless?! Do homeless people have laptops?!…now that I think about it, yeah…yeah they do. Anyways, here are some thangs I been bumping in my pinto the last lil while. I COULD write about the music but let’s face it. None of you actually give a fuck what I think about the music. So I will tell you what I been doing on my travels instead!! Ima keep these short n sweet so that you don’t have to read my bullshit too long.

Trivecta & Eminence – Now You Know (ft. Aloma Steele)

Journal entry 1- I left a lot of food for my cat and left my 3 legged dog with the neighbor who’s also looking out for my cat. He better not feed the cat to the dog. They don’t like each other.

Follow: trivectamusic / emnc / alomasteele

Herobust – Vertebreaker

Journal entry 2 – I ran out of potato chips at 3 am on the i-5. Ended up eating eminems I found melted in the console. It was one giant melted eminem. Peanuts inside, it looked like poop.


Follow: Herobust

Two Friends ft. Cosmos & Creature – Out Of Love

Journal entry 3 – Pretty sure the eminems were poisoned. Either that or it really was poop.


Palastic – Matches (ft. Nathan)

Journal Entry 4 – Totally got pulled over for throwing up out my driver’s side window without stopping the car. I am still imagining the police report. That was way too good. 75$ fine. Totally worth it.


Follow: Palastic

Teip “Tipsy”

Journal Entry 5 – I slept on the side of some creepy highway, a bit up from the rest stop. The truckers freak me out. A woodsy prostitute woke me at 3 am by knocking on my read window, offering her services. If the service included finding me a fucking shower I might have taken her up on it.

Follow: Teip

WOLFE X Emma Sameth X DNTST – Higher

Journal Entry 6 – I saw a hay truck on fire while still driving down the highway today. I swear America is so crazy yo. The most ridiculous part is, no one was signaling the guy like, “Cletus! your hay is on fire!” They were just kinda… trying to get to work.

Follow: WOLFE


Journal Entry 7 – Seriously tired of eating chips. I went to pee in this little forest in Oregon just off the highway and I could have sworn I heard an arrow whiz by me and smash into a tree down the way. I didn’t investigate. Instead, I ran the fuck outta there with pee all over my pants and took off.

Follow: KRANE and all the other artists in this list you hamsters!

Ohkay – Dutty Heart (Remix)

Journal Entry 8 – I fuckin’ caved and got a hotel in Salem Oregon. The bathroom consisted of hooker escape ledges by the window. Literally heel prints on that shit. White tile, not wiped down. I stashed my backpack in the shower as no one ever looks in the shower when you’re getting robbed, beaten and raped in the middle of the night. But 34 dollars! Great deal right?!

Follow: Ohkay

Rainsford – Sweet Spot (feat. Swimsuit Issue)

Journal Entry 9 – I made it to San Francisco today. I had a cheap beer and listened to overpaid programmers complain about Paralaxing in Unity3D. Apparently there are some drawbacks to the new update you guys. Now to go fucking shoot myself for allowing this conversation to enter my head.

Follow: Rainsford

Bryce Fox – Horns (StéLouse Remix)

Journal Entry 10 – I could only take San Francisco’s bullshit for 3 days. This is day 3. I am getting the hell outta here. Sure the Starbucks where you can see a fucking prison in the middle of the water is cool and all, but I am so not down with the middle of the road Tram thingy. Seriously? Are we trapped in some quasi steam-punk reality? I am just waiting for a fucking baby or and elderly woman to crawl across one of those rails one day. Them things are fucking HAND BRAKE operated!!! This place is bonkers. Not to mention the hills. No wonder Full House was full of creepy moments…I think it was filmed there.

Follow: StéLouse

Thurxday – Alright (w/ eddie202)

Journal Entry 11 – I got to LA. But on the way, I did manage to see one of the most distrubing farms ever. Half the cows were literally just sideways laying there dead on the field. Welp, that’s that for red meat in America as far as I’m concerned. No bueno. I am going to go find myself some cheap mexican food. Some Carne Asada or…. FUCK!

Follow: Thurxday

Tasty Treat – Fallin’ In Love

Journal Entry 12 – I ended up lasting 3 hours not eating beef. Hated myself for about 3 hours after that. Afterwhich, I went geocaching in LA! have you heard of this?! it’s where you find random treasure! You use this nifty little app. Only my treasure was that I ended up picking apart a lock box on a statue in some grimey area called Echo Park. I woke up a crackhead and he sprayed me with a bottle of what I still hope, was water.

Follow: Tasty Treat

Ok Kids. I’m out for now.



The Weeknd – Party Monster (KRANE Remix)

This is a bit different from the KRANE I listened to a year or even half a year ago. But it is important for artists to evolve so I ain’t mad at it. I’m old and shit anyways. I can only take loud trap sounds for so long before I want to pull the remainder of my hair out. So go here kids and enjoy yourselves.

Follow KRANE

Guap. Out.

KREAM – Taped Up Heart (feat. Clara Mae) – Joe Mason Remix

Here is what happens when you know how to use hypersaws and 80’s influences of pop music. Most of the time people get this wrong and give birth to some terrible sounding shit. This Joe Mason remix is dope. I will admit however, that I got no clue what the original sounds like, but I dig this enough to not really give a shit about checking.

Follow Joe Mason

Guap. Out.

Guappy’s Giant Travel Playlist

So I have been galavanting in obscure lands full of chocolate and drugs lately. Here are a shit tonne of songs that I been jamming to while doing so. I will not comment on the music too hard as it’s already obvious that I think it’s good and having me shower these things with compliments does nothing in my opinion.  I will give you brief snapshots of my travels instead!! Music is meant to be heard man. So click around, listen, and follow the artists you like because those follows actually count for something.

Post PM: “OH?”

I arrived to Eastern Europe in November without a jacket. I looked like an asshole. Then the only jacket I could find that was decent, was an Armani one with a fur hood… I looked like an even bigger asshole then.

Jaalid – Rogue (feat. Guepy Georges)

Someone tryin to bite my Guappy style with their Guepy lil’ name yo. I listened to this little rnb number  in a sauna in a hotel one night. There were three Czech girls there and that was dope as fuuuuu…  Didn’t get laid though. However, the pity points were flying high cos i feigned a broken leg and told them I broke it rescuing a dog from an abusive owner. He hit me with his car .*wink*

Superorganism – Something For Your M.I.N.D

At first I read this as superorgasm and was super stoked because I haven’t had one of those in a decade. The reality dawned on me shortly after but I remain in high spirits that one day, I will once more, have a superduperorgasm. This song is great for train travel. I remember looking out the window on a 6 hour train trip and seeing all these busted up lil houses that look like they got hit by bombs and farm animals and shit. It kinda fit.

Greg Aram – Okay, Alright

I played this for my uber driver. He was in his 60’s and smelled of cigarette butts. I think he was really into it!! Them old Euro guys are into rnb smooth shit man. I bet he was a ladykiller when he was younger… figuratively speaking. Or even literally.

ROB – What’s Next

What’s next Rob? I will tell you what’s next. Next you’re gonna get them girls with the big booty and expensive taste in wine, with that whiteboy hiphop rnb shit you’re pullin off on this song. I am actually into this one a lot. I blast this shit in my hotel in the mornings while brushing my teeth and pretending I am in YOUR music video. Serious.

Pegboard Nerds & NGHTMRE – Superstar feat. Krewella (Unlike Pluto remix)

I have posted Unlike Pluto before. And he hit me again with this new shit with a giant bloated name that I actually had to copy and paste because NO!

King Deco – Read My Lips (FKYA Remix)

These two gents are good guys at stuff. Music is stuff and I enjoy when they do it. Fuckyeah boys! ;) see what I did there?

Memba – Warrior

This some stankface make your neck have multiple chins type music. I tried to play this to a bunch of Polish kids who did ecstasy. Lots of high pitched noises.

Phiilo – Higher Places

I pretended this guy was my friend when I was at a party so that the girls think I’m cool. ” Yeah the guy is super nice yo. Great voice, smooth as silk and all the girls love him so they also love me because I am friends with him!”

1WayTKT feat. Netousha Monroe – Insanity

You know what the definition of insanity is? It’s when you do fuckin’ complicated shit for literally no reason. Such as put numbers and combinations of all caps and lowercase in your name. Seriously. If this song didn’t sound like a girl I wanted to date in the 90’s, then I would fuckin’ strangle the creative genius behind that name. With hugs of course. Strangle with hugs.  Well done on this song here. The vibe really helped my euro trip travels.

Dimond Saints – Stay feat. Yarrohs

The chorus on this is so dopely greasy. Like the deep fried potato pancakes I got in Poland the other day. Did you know that you can grate down potatoes with onion and a little bit of egg and deep fry that shit and pretend that the heart attack around the corner is nothing but a “pancake”?

Pham- Talk To Me (feat. Anuka)

Yo when an engineer gets the warm analog mix right, it’s so right. It literally reminds me of getting my new sony headphones in high school for my new sports lock walkman. It’s like a blanket made of the softest of lamb wool. For your brain. I was traversing through cold Warsaw streets listening to this shit and it was perfect for my frost bitten head… Shitty graffiti on walls that shouldn’t be vandalized around me, these trains that just recklessly cut through traffic intersections, women that definitely don’t want to talk to me… :)

Kaleem Taylor – By My Side

Keep Kaleem Taylor away from any girl I know! Unless she is a swamp ting for whom I have no attraction whatsoever. My standards are lower than ice cube’s 1990s pants though so it’s probably safe to say, keep Kaleem away from all women in my life. You panty dropper you. With them slick opening lines.

JSPH – Breathe

Here is another guy I don’t want around my harem. I got a soft spot for this stop and go rnb soul shit. Maybe I was meant to be born with a verginer and boobies.

Chilo – Consistency

This Dilla and Madlib style of hiphop is perfect for long walks through shite neighbourhoods. I literally had a fuckin piece of a wall fall on me while I was listening to this! No joke! I was walking back from my favorite restaurant and i felt someone tap me on the shoulder. I look back, no one there. I look up and a bunch of rocks were falling from like, 4 stories up! I ran and a giant chunk of a the face of the building fell right where I was walking. The best part was, no one around me seemed phased by it at all.


Some smooth westcoast g shit for your new age years here. I miss my hazy LA sunsets when I listen to this song. Ugh, what I wouldn’t do to be in my shitty spanish hills neighbourhood on my porch right now.

I.Y.F.F.E – So High (feat. Wiktoria Kolosowa)

This guy is literally one of the only producers whom I don’t ream out for their use of Hypersaws and LFO’s. Usually that shit just turns into a hot mess. But I still don’t fuckin’ know how to say his damn name. Like, why you gotta be so complicated fam?

John F Henessy – Fast Cars, Drugs and Social Anxiety

John F Henessy is one of the dopest names I have come across in a long time. I love this. And the music is dope as fuck. It sounds exactly what I would imagine a man by this name to sound like. Here is one thing though. John, I didn’t fuck up your title by dropping a comma. A comma before an “and” isn’t necessary. I know I make plenty of grammar errors but usually it’s because I am just lazy and it makes me look cooler when my grammar is on par with a lab chimp’s.

Don Lifted – Harbor Hall

I feel like, if Kid Cudi was a better rapper he would sound like this kid here. This vibe yo. It’s so groovy. I am a sucker for wonky experimental moody rnb.  This video should have more love. Keep doin your thing lil Don.

Okay Kids! That is all for now! I am going back to steam rooms with old italian dudes talking business but really they’re beaten down by their arthritis and their wives. So they get away once a day and pretend to be powerful by swearing and waving their hands in a sauna where no one can hear them cry.

Guap. Out.

The Chainsmokers – Paris

Okay so this is totally fucked you guys. My girlfriend went to Paris not a long time ago and I was like, okay you are going with your friends and you don’t want me to go because I don’t like snails and I think eating bone marrow out of a cut up femur roasted in an oven is a little fucked. ( They do that, the French..) She leaves and I am LOVING LIFE. So much freedom, no nagging ! It’s fuckin heaven! So one morning at 4 pm, I log into my youtube account, still in my jammies, and look at these fucking parkour fails as a way to get myself ready for another day out there in the world, when on my sidebar a suggestion comes  up. Chainsmokers… So I’m like, alright alright I will listen to this before I get DESTROYED with remix submissions and I end up  not liking the original. The song is about paris but I don’t think this was filmed there. Unless I am just really fuckin mistaken about Paris. In which case, I would be pissed, cos I wanna romp around with some hussy on beaches amongst palm trees. Justy sayin.

Guap. Out.

Follow The Chainsmokers cos they’re pretty neat.

What’s in my Sony Walkman?


Salt Ashes “Save It” Control-S Remix

I remember being in the 90’s and this takes me right back there. I can’t wait to spin this at a local party where the beers are cheap, and the women are all short and sweaty. Yo also, I bet this producer is a fuckin’ Power PC user cos otherwise their name would be Command S. What is annoying here though is that the LABEL that put this out, didn’t put the link to whoever Control-S is and that pisses me off.  So I am putting Radikal Records on blast here. Huge writeup about ALL THIS SHIT I WILL NEVER READ under the Soundcloud description but you’re missing the person who remixed it!? Really? I did some googling though!

Follow Salt Ashes and CONTROL-S

Thurxday “Shoreditch”

Not gonna lie, at first few seconds of a listen I was like, chipmunks voices? But then it turned out homie Thurxday from South Korea got some soul yo. I hear all sorts of things about South Korea. Such as, they build upwards cos that place just ain’t got the space on the ground to house all the people. I imagine one day that it will pretty much look like all the Anime cartoons look. At that time, I shall visit. Until then, I will avoid it cos I don’t think I can handle the spicy cabbage and shit like that.


Anuka “Colorblind”

Anuka you are a sexy sounding little mermaid and I love it. This cut has some really cool drunky vibes. The bells in the production really worked for me. I love that half cut wobbly shit. The subject matter is cool here and the vocal execution is exactly what it needs to be. Pretty effortless. I want to like, clean my room to this. In my boxers, all sexy  like, while a girl is on the bed drinking wine and everything is happening in slow motion.

Follow: ANUKA

Unlike Pluto “Someone New”

I like Unlike Pluto yo. I have posted some of the homie’s music in the past and here I go again. This cut is soulful as fuck. It makes me miss the early days of Flume, not in the fact that the production is similar but that you got dope groove on the drums, it hits heavy and has soulful vocals on the cut. Great work Pluto. I would never Unlike you. I suggest y’all LIKE Pluto and follow! (see the dry pun here? oh yeah.. one step away from being a dad)

Follow:  unlikepluto

Kevin Livez “Flutter”

Sometimes I dig weird bedroom hiphop that is heavily autotuned. Sometimes I FUCKIN HATE IT. Usually I hate it and my first response is, nah fam, get outta here with your autotune. But today is one of those days where I came along something weirdly raw enough to appeal to me. Don’t get me wrong. There is lots of work that needs to be done on this song still in my opinion. But sometimes a song has something in it regardless. So sip your purple and sprite and enjoy yourself some Kevin Livez.


Lost Kings “Phone Down” Evan Berg Remix

The intro on this next number is so strong. The vocal chops and chords compliment each other perfectly. This is some dope pop shit. I get a bit annoyed at the girl telling me to put my fuckin’ phone down in the song though. She talkin about being there with her clothes off while homie is on his phone. I mean… girl, he probably checkin’ his instagram thots. Give the man some space! Sounds like he NEVER puts the phone down by what I am here here. I think it might be all the nagging. Usually I get like that when I get nagged at. Just sayin’, that maybe you’re just boring and frumpy or some shit yo. Be honest with yourself girl. Good work Evan Berg and Lost Kings “Phone Down”



Starley “Call On Me” Edwynn x Tikal x Spirix REMIX

I like this remix of Starley a lot more than the original. The original bored me. Some crazy how, Edwynn , Tikal and Spirix put their heads together on some power ranger shit and made it happen.

Follow:  @starleymusic , @edwynntikal , @spirixmusic

Garrett Lodge “Hollywood ft Malcolm Anthony”

This song goes iiinnnn. I want to be in some dingy sweaty club spilling my vodka orange on some scenester’s shoes. The artworks is fucked uuuppp too so I am totally into it. Let’s do some drrruugggssss to this. “HOLLYWOOD”

Follow Garrett Lodge

Xan Griffin “U Remind Me”

The intro to this song is obscenely epic. It’s to a point where I get a little sick listening to it. Like, wtf am I in a movie with some ridiculous love chase where everything is a montage?! But the chorus on this is soooo proper that you could pretty much have 3 minutes of fart sounds and I would still post it.


Guap. Out.