Okay Kids. So I have been on the road and growing a beard lately. Shit is getting real out here. The other day I ate a can of baked beans, cold, in the parking lot of a gas station while little 8 year old Spanish kids laughed at me and called me homeless. I just wanted to see the world man! Homeless?! Do homeless people have laptops?!…now that I think about it, yeah…yeah they do. Anyways, here are some thangs I been bumping in my pinto the last lil while. I COULD write about the music but let’s face it. None of you actually give a fuck what I think about the music. So I will tell you what I been doing on my travels instead!! Ima keep these short n sweet so that you don’t have to read my bullshit too long.
Trivecta & Eminence – Now You Know (ft. Aloma Steele)
Journal entry 1- I left a lot of food for my cat and left my 3 legged dog with the neighbor who’s also looking out for my cat. He better not feed the cat to the dog. They don’t like each other.
Herobust – Vertebreaker
Journal entry 2 – I ran out of potato chips at 3 am on the i-5. Ended up eating eminems I found melted in the console. It was one giant melted eminem. Peanuts inside, it looked like poop.
Two Friends ft. Cosmos & Creature – Out Of Love
Journal entry 3 – Pretty sure the eminems were poisoned. Either that or it really was poop.
Follow: TWO FRIENDS
Palastic – Matches (ft. Nathan)
Journal Entry 4 – Totally got pulled over for throwing up out my driver’s side window without stopping the car. I am still imagining the police report. That was way too good. 75$ fine. Totally worth it.
Journal Entry 5 – I slept on the side of some creepy highway, a bit up from the rest stop. The truckers freak me out. A woodsy prostitute woke me at 3 am by knocking on my read window, offering her services. If the service included finding me a fucking shower I might have taken her up on it.
WOLFE X Emma Sameth X DNTST – Higher
Journal Entry 6 – I saw a hay truck on fire while still driving down the highway today. I swear America is so crazy yo. The most ridiculous part is, no one was signaling the guy like, “Cletus! your hay is on fire!” They were just kinda… trying to get to work.
Journal Entry 7 – Seriously tired of eating chips. I went to pee in this little forest in Oregon just off the highway and I could have sworn I heard an arrow whiz by me and smash into a tree down the way. I didn’t investigate. Instead, I ran the fuck outta there with pee all over my pants and took off.
Follow: KRANE and all the other artists in this list you hamsters!
Ohkay – Dutty Heart (Remix)
Journal Entry 8 – I fuckin’ caved and got a hotel in Salem Oregon. The bathroom consisted of hooker escape ledges by the window. Literally heel prints on that shit. White tile, not wiped down. I stashed my backpack in the shower as no one ever looks in the shower when you’re getting robbed, beaten and raped in the middle of the night. But 34 dollars! Great deal right?!
Rainsford – Sweet Spot (feat. Swimsuit Issue)
Journal Entry 9 – I made it to San Francisco today. I had a cheap beer and listened to overpaid programmers complain about Paralaxing in Unity3D. Apparently there are some drawbacks to the new update you guys. Now to go fucking shoot myself for allowing this conversation to enter my head.
Bryce Fox – Horns (StéLouse Remix)
Journal Entry 10 – I could only take San Francisco’s bullshit for 3 days. This is day 3. I am getting the hell outta here. Sure the Starbucks where you can see a fucking prison in the middle of the water is cool and all, but I am so not down with the middle of the road Tram thingy. Seriously? Are we trapped in some quasi steam-punk reality? I am just waiting for a fucking baby or and elderly woman to crawl across one of those rails one day. Them things are fucking HAND BRAKE operated!!! This place is bonkers. Not to mention the hills. No wonder Full House was full of creepy moments…I think it was filmed there.
Thurxday – Alright (w/ eddie202)
Journal Entry 11 – I got to LA. But on the way, I did manage to see one of the most distrubing farms ever. Half the cows were literally just sideways laying there dead on the field. Welp, that’s that for red meat in America as far as I’m concerned. No bueno. I am going to go find myself some cheap mexican food. Some Carne Asada or…. FUCK!
Tasty Treat – Fallin’ In Love
Journal Entry 12 – I ended up lasting 3 hours not eating beef. Hated myself for about 3 hours after that. Afterwhich, I went geocaching in LA! have you heard of this?! it’s where you find random treasure! You use this nifty little app. Only my treasure was that I ended up picking apart a lock box on a statue in some grimey area called Echo Park. I woke up a crackhead and he sprayed me with a bottle of what I still hope, was water.
Follow: Tasty Treat
Ok Kids. I’m out for now.