So I have been galavanting in obscure lands full of chocolate and drugs lately. Here are a shit tonne of songs that I been jamming to while doing so. I will not comment on the music too hard as it’s already obvious that I think it’s good and having me shower these things with compliments does nothing in my opinion. I will give you brief snapshots of my travels instead!! Music is meant to be heard man. So click around, listen, and follow the artists you like because those follows actually count for something.
I arrived to Eastern Europe in November without a jacket. I looked like an asshole. Then the only jacket I could find that was decent, was an Armani one with a fur hood… I looked like an even bigger asshole then.
Jaalid – Rogue (feat. Guepy Georges)
Someone tryin to bite my Guappy style with their Guepy lil’ name yo. I listened to this little rnb number in a sauna in a hotel one night. There were three Czech girls there and that was dope as fuuuuu… Didn’t get laid though. However, the pity points were flying high cos i feigned a broken leg and told them I broke it rescuing a dog from an abusive owner. He hit me with his car .*wink*
Superorganism – Something For Your M.I.N.D
At first I read this as superorgasm and was super stoked because I haven’t had one of those in a decade. The reality dawned on me shortly after but I remain in high spirits that one day, I will once more, have a superduperorgasm. This song is great for train travel. I remember looking out the window on a 6 hour train trip and seeing all these busted up lil houses that look like they got hit by bombs and farm animals and shit. It kinda fit.
I played this for my uber driver. He was in his 60’s and smelled of cigarette butts. I think he was really into it!! Them old Euro guys are into rnb smooth shit man. I bet he was a ladykiller when he was younger… figuratively speaking. Or even literally.
What’s next Rob? I will tell you what’s next. Next you’re gonna get them girls with the big booty and expensive taste in wine, with that whiteboy hiphop rnb shit you’re pullin off on this song. I am actually into this one a lot. I blast this shit in my hotel in the mornings while brushing my teeth and pretending I am in YOUR music video. Serious.
Pegboard Nerds & NGHTMRE – Superstar feat. Krewella (Unlike Pluto remix)
I have posted Unlike Pluto before. And he hit me again with this new shit with a giant bloated name that I actually had to copy and paste because NO!
King Deco – Read My Lips (FKYA Remix)
These two gents are good guys at stuff. Music is stuff and I enjoy when they do it. Fuckyeah boys! ;) see what I did there?
This some stankface make your neck have multiple chins type music. I tried to play this to a bunch of Polish kids who did ecstasy. Lots of high pitched noises.
I pretended this guy was my friend when I was at a party so that the girls think I’m cool. ” Yeah the guy is super nice yo. Great voice, smooth as silk and all the girls love him so they also love me because I am friends with him!”
1WayTKT feat. Netousha Monroe – Insanity
You know what the definition of insanity is? It’s when you do fuckin’ complicated shit for literally no reason. Such as put numbers and combinations of all caps and lowercase in your name. Seriously. If this song didn’t sound like a girl I wanted to date in the 90’s, then I would fuckin’ strangle the creative genius behind that name. With hugs of course. Strangle with hugs. Well done on this song here. The vibe really helped my euro trip travels.
Dimond Saints – Stay feat. Yarrohs
The chorus on this is so dopely greasy. Like the deep fried potato pancakes I got in Poland the other day. Did you know that you can grate down potatoes with onion and a little bit of egg and deep fry that shit and pretend that the heart attack around the corner is nothing but a “pancake”?
Pham- Talk To Me (feat. Anuka)
Yo when an engineer gets the warm analog mix right, it’s so right. It literally reminds me of getting my new sony headphones in high school for my new sports lock walkman. It’s like a blanket made of the softest of lamb wool. For your brain. I was traversing through cold Warsaw streets listening to this shit and it was perfect for my frost bitten head… Shitty graffiti on walls that shouldn’t be vandalized around me, these trains that just recklessly cut through traffic intersections, women that definitely don’t want to talk to me… :)
Keep Kaleem Taylor away from any girl I know! Unless she is a swamp ting for whom I have no attraction whatsoever. My standards are lower than ice cube’s 1990s pants though so it’s probably safe to say, keep Kaleem away from all women in my life. You panty dropper you. With them slick opening lines.
Here is another guy I don’t want around my harem. I got a soft spot for this stop and go rnb soul shit. Maybe I was meant to be born with a verginer and boobies.
This Dilla and Madlib style of hiphop is perfect for long walks through shite neighbourhoods. I literally had a fuckin piece of a wall fall on me while I was listening to this! No joke! I was walking back from my favorite restaurant and i felt someone tap me on the shoulder. I look back, no one there. I look up and a bunch of rocks were falling from like, 4 stories up! I ran and a giant chunk of a the face of the building fell right where I was walking. The best part was, no one around me seemed phased by it at all.
Some smooth westcoast g shit for your new age years here. I miss my hazy LA sunsets when I listen to this song. Ugh, what I wouldn’t do to be in my shitty spanish hills neighbourhood on my porch right now.
I.Y.F.F.E – So High (feat. Wiktoria Kolosowa)
This guy is literally one of the only producers whom I don’t ream out for their use of Hypersaws and LFO’s. Usually that shit just turns into a hot mess. But I still don’t fuckin’ know how to say his damn name. Like, why you gotta be so complicated fam?
John F Henessy – Fast Cars, Drugs and Social Anxiety
John F Henessy is one of the dopest names I have come across in a long time. I love this. And the music is dope as fuck. It sounds exactly what I would imagine a man by this name to sound like. Here is one thing though. John, I didn’t fuck up your title by dropping a comma. A comma before an “and” isn’t necessary. I know I make plenty of grammar errors but usually it’s because I am just lazy and it makes me look cooler when my grammar is on par with a lab chimp’s.
I feel like, if Kid Cudi was a better rapper he would sound like this kid here. This vibe yo. It’s so groovy. I am a sucker for wonky experimental moody rnb. This video should have more love. Keep doin your thing lil Don.
Okay Kids! That is all for now! I am going back to steam rooms with old italian dudes talking business but really they’re beaten down by their arthritis and their wives. So they get away once a day and pretend to be powerful by swearing and waving their hands in a sauna where no one can hear them cry.
Guap. Out.
